Showing posts with label baby bump. Show all posts
Showing posts with label baby bump. Show all posts

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Sad, Regretful Baby-less Celebs

Today I thought it would be interesting to spend a little time on the despicable way the media promotes the message that motherhood is the ultimate fulfilment in life and women who opt out of motherhood are destined to a life of unhappiness and regret. Of course, you, my childfree friends and sympathizers, and me know this message is complete and utter hogwash and recognize it as part of the rampant pronatalism designed to keep women bound to their reproductive roles at the expense of other fulfilling endeavors. We are completely innundated with this message from every direction, every second of our lives, but magazine covers like this illustrate it so blantantly and obnoxiously, they just beg for discussion.

I came across this magazine this morning while waiting in line at the supermarket. Just look at the cover...a small off-to-the-side photo of a despondent-looking Jennifer Aniston looking away wisftully as the caption reads, "39 & Wishing she'd had Brad's Babies". Her hair is stringy and she's not looking her best. Meanwhile, a beautiful, radiant and obviously deliriously happy Angelina Jolie, gets a huge, center-stage photo. Her photo triumphs over Jen's and she looks the most beautiful she ever has. Her caption reads, "Angie's Joy, Jen's Pain...After 3 years, ANGELINA'S got it all While JEN'S Still Tortured by "the Woman who Ruined my Life and Keeps Wondering What if..."

Ever since Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt broke up, rumor has had it that their break-up was due to their differences on having children - Brad wanted them, Jen did not. Whether this rumor is true or not doesn't matter. What's interesting is that underneath all this focus on Jen and Brad's breakup, and Angie's subsequent reign as Goddess Mother, is this message:

"See, Jen. This is what you get for being a selfish bitch and not fulfilling your duties as a woman. You wanted it all, didn't you? You wanted to have fun in the sun, pursue your acting career, be caught up in all the Hollywood glamour and be a big hot shot, maybe make it big in the movies and you sacrificed having babies (horrors!!!) so you could be so self-centered! Well you got what you deserved because look - ANGELINA wasn't selfish - she had babies like she was supposed to and LOOK AT HER! She's more beautiful than you, she's far happier, a bigger star than you AND she got BRAD PITT! What do YOU have? You're still single and can't seem to keep a man and now you're sorry, aren't you? You are a sad, pathetic excuse for a woman!"

Oh, and while we're here, let's also take notice of the rest of the this magazine cover because the Angie and Jen story apparently wasn't enough baby-obsessing for OK Magazine this month. We have Jamie Lynn Spears and her beau with the caption "Ready for Baby" (a pretty upbeat tone, don't you think, considering she's 16, unmarried and pregnant?) and underneath, a smily photo of Anna Nicole's daughter and her father, Larry Birkhead, showing that even when mommy celebrities are dead, we must still obsess over their babies.

So in addition to providing enough disgust to make me want to barf up my breakfast today, magazine covers like this beg the question...is there NOTHING ELSE going on in the celebrity world other than the glorification of breeding? Are the stars capable of nothing more interesting to entertain us than screwing and popping out their spawn?

And the scariest question of all: Who's responsible for this fixation on celebrity breeding? Is it the media, or is it US?

Monday, October 22, 2007

Bashing the Baby Bump

Is it just me, or is the media frenzy surrounding celebrity "baby bumps" extremely annoying and tiresome? I like to follow celebrity news like every other mindless American but this is ridiculous. Let me ask you, friends...do YOU care which celebrities are pregnant? Does the sight of a female celebrity frolicking in a loose fitting smock send you racing to the entertainment tabloids? When a celebrity's baby is born, do you hustle to the t.v. and hungrily flip channels to see the first footage of the precious little imp?

I personally don't know anyone who gives two hoots about celebrity pregnancies and yet if you are to believe the entertainment television shows, tabloids, blogs and web sites, knocked up celebs are on the top of everyone's MUST KNOW list (but then again, so is the latest on Britney Spears' trainwreck life and I can't figure that out either).

I've given this some thought and the only thing I can think of that may be remotely interesting about celeb's pregnancy is watching previously rail-thin, concentration camp-looking bodies expand into enormity and seeing how they cope with it. Will they get stretch marks and saggy boobs like normal women (probably not, thanks to cosmetic surgery and personal trainers)? This just shows you how hungry Americans are for mindless entertainment because the plain fact is that there just ain't nothin' exceptional or interesting about getting impregnanted and having babies. As I have said before, it's just so ordinary.

Sadly, media frenzy does not end with the birth of the baby. We are bombarded with the nail-bitingly, edge-of-your-seat excitement of Brangelina taking their brood to the playground. WHO GIVES A FLYING FUCK? How empty must a person's life be to find a photo of Brad Pitt pushing his kid on a swing entertaining?

No, I just don't get it, and I guess that's a good thing because if I did get it, that would make a pretty sad statment about me.