Musings on the Childfree Lifestyle and our Child-Centric Society
Thursday, June 30, 2016
Reason #102 not to have kids
102. You will never have to post selfies of yourself in a crop top with a dopey duck-lip expression and vines on your head to teach your skanky daughter to stop doing it.
I loved this! The stupid-ass look on her face is cringe-worthy, and the dad mocks it perfectly. I have to say, though, if my dad told me to take something down or to quit doing something, I listened to him. There really was no other choice.
I came across your blog about 2 weeks ago and glad I did. My husband and I have been married for 11 years and have no children. When we got married, we both wanted kids and tried right away. But it never happened. Before we were married, we both talked how we were open to the fact that we may get pregnant right away. We were also at the same time open to the fact that it may not happen right away, if at all. And we both agreed that we were going to be happy no what.
When we got married, my best friend at the time and her husband started trying for children, and it turned out she had to go on fertility pills. I felt bad for her at the time, but then she started going crazy about not getting pregnant especially when other people around her were. She even told my husband that she's be upset if I got pregnant first like this was some kind of race. And she told anyone that would listen that she'll start hating her husband if they don't have kids.
So we both decided we had to distance ourselves from them. As much as I wanted a baby, I have never gone ballistic about not having one. And I promised my husband I never will.
Well it turned out we weren't able to have kids either. We discussed adoption, but decided it wasn't for us. So we went on with our happy lives and even got a cat. But as the years went on, we've gotten all the comments that a lot of other childless couples get.
We've gotten, "You'll regret it if you don't have any, I thought you were guys were a Catholic couple, you know having a cat is not the same, who's going to take care of you when you guys get old, must be nice to have all that free time...etc."
While we still continued to try, it wasn't until 3 years ago, that I started to lose my desire to have children. I've been working in childcare since I was out of college and the kids over the years have gotten so bratty and entitled. I also gotten frustrated how parents don't discipline anymore since they would rather be their friend.
I realized how lucky my husband and I are to come and go and we please. Vacations will feel like vacations. We don't have to worry about saving up for college. I can read a book or watch whatever I want in peace. I can go out with my friends and not have to worry about a sitter. When we celebrated our 10 year anniversary last year, he asked me if I regret about us not having kids, and I said absolutely not without even hesistating. I still like kids since I teach them, but I'm just glad we don't have any.
Believe it or not, when I was in college, all I could think about was getting married and having kids. I was naïve to think that having kids would be happily ever after and couldn't understand why women didn't want any. Then as I got older and I finally understood and felt ignorant for thinking the way I did back then.
Just because someone says they don't want kids, doesn't make him or her a bad person at all. It makes them honest.
5 comments:
I loved this! The stupid-ass look on her face is cringe-worthy, and the dad mocks it perfectly. I have to say, though, if my dad told me to take something down or to quit doing something, I listened to him. There really was no other choice.
I came across your blog about 2 weeks ago and glad I did. My husband and I have been married for 11 years and have no children. When we got married, we both wanted kids and tried right away. But it never happened. Before we were married, we both talked how we were open to the fact that we may get pregnant right away. We were also at the same time open to the fact that it may not happen right away, if at all. And we both agreed that we were going to be happy no what.
When we got married, my best friend at the time and her husband started trying for children, and it turned out she had to go on fertility pills. I felt bad for her at the time, but then she started going crazy about not getting pregnant especially when other people around her were. She even told my husband that she's be upset if I got pregnant first like this was some kind of race. And she told anyone that would listen that she'll start hating her husband if they don't have kids.
So we both decided we had to distance ourselves from them. As much as I wanted a baby, I have never gone ballistic about not having one. And I promised my husband I never will.
Well it turned out we weren't able to have kids either. We discussed adoption, but decided it wasn't for us. So we went on with our happy lives and even got a cat. But as the years went on, we've gotten all the comments that a lot of other childless couples get.
We've gotten, "You'll regret it if you don't have any, I thought you were guys were a Catholic couple, you know having a cat is not the same, who's going to take care of you when you guys get old, must be nice to have all that free time...etc."
While we still continued to try, it wasn't until 3 years ago, that I started to lose my desire to have children. I've been working in childcare since I was out of college and the kids over the years have gotten so bratty and entitled. I also gotten frustrated how parents don't discipline anymore since they would rather be their friend.
I realized how lucky my husband and I are to come and go and we please. Vacations will feel like vacations. We don't have to worry about saving up for college. I can read a book or watch whatever I want in peace. I can go out with my friends and not have to worry about a sitter. When we celebrated our 10 year anniversary last year, he asked me if I regret about us not having kids, and I said absolutely not without even hesistating. I still like kids since I teach them, but I'm just glad we don't have any.
Believe it or not, when I was in college, all I could think about was getting married and having kids. I was naïve to think that having kids would be happily ever after and couldn't understand why women didn't want any. Then as I got older and I finally understood and felt ignorant for thinking the way I did back then.
Just because someone says they don't want kids, doesn't make him or her a bad person at all. It makes them honest.
You should do a page on Lucy Worsley- shes opted out of motherhood.
Great article thank. I have always wondered about "Reason #102 not to have kids"
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