Here's an entertaining video posted by a mom who is lamenting all the things she misses now that she has kids. Thankfully, there's no "but it's so worth it" backpedal at the end. Be sure to read the comments below her video for lots of other moms chiming in and adding to the list.
My childfree friends, let it not escape us how similar their list of things they miss is to my list of the Top 100 Reasons Not to Have Kids. See, there is actually some truth to the stuff I write ;)
Thank you to CFVixen for the forward.
7 comments:
Those little things that she mentioned, like sitting on the couch looking at a magazine or reading a book, are really some of my big reasons for not wanting kids. I like to decompress after a day at work and having to come home to a second job is not something I ever want to do. I have so many parents who come to work and say they are so happy to be there because it's so much nicer than being at home with their kids! Which begs the question: Why did you have them in the first place?
It's enough to think about losing freedom to do things involving your career or travel or seeing friends, but it just gets depressing to list all the little things too! I do not understand the concept of "work/life balance" when it is related to being a working mother, no, you have a "paid work/what somehow escapes the legal definition of slavery" balance!
CFVixen, your comment had me laughing pretty good…especially this part, "why did you have them in the first place?" Soooo much truth to this blog post! From the outside looking in at families, it's always been disturbing to see the obvious signs of parents who really wish they had chosen NOT to have kids. Even more so, when people TRY to guilt trip my wife and I into having kids it's easy for us to see how "misery loves company."
BlueFlyer83...it truly boggles the mind. When people ask me why I didn't want to have children, I'm so tempted to ask them why they did! There is nothing (from conception on) that appeals to me. Let's see...morning sickness, weight gain, stretch marks, strange cravings, weird people touching your belly, unwanted advice, inability to sleep. And that's just pregnancy. Now we get into childbirth...hours of labor, pain and suffering, torn vaginas, shit on the table, possible death, etc. Plus it's a crap shoot...birth defects, mental retardation, autism, other special needs. Now let's talk about bringing your baby (special needs or not) home...crying, colic, not sleeping through the night, shitty diapers, cracked nipples from breastfeeding, etc. Next is terrible two's. Then comes "why, why, why!" Also the price of daycare vs. giving up your career. Then comes all of the sports, activities, playdates, loss of self. Oh good...next we get to experience the angst of the teenager!! Drugs, teenage pregnancy, bullying, drunk driving, etc. And then, if we're lucky, our kid will go to college! Get ready to fork over your wallet! Oh, and maybe, just maybe, he or she will graduate. And then move back with you because they can't get a job. Yes, it sounds so fulfilling! Sign me right up!!
Every single one of her reasons just confirms why i never had or wanted kids! Because I want a career and a life and I don't want every second of my off time to be about kids kids kids! Thankfully, I dodged that bullet and have never regretted it...here's to the childfree life!
Loving your posts!
Yes to everything posted here! But furthermore: my mom was/is the mom who didn't want kids, but had me anyways because she felt she had to (for whatever reason that is). At 27 years old, I can tell you that knowing this really messes with you growing up. I could never do that to someone. If you don't want kids, then don't have them. To do so anyways is completely and totally selfish. Once this mom's kids start to grow up I bet they are going to need tons of therapy for feeling like a burden in her life... but "sooo worth it."
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