tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post8946922777588536569..comments2023-10-29T08:17:42.840-07:00Comments on Childfreedom: Don't Worry, Be HappyChildfreeeeehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01776614837813912148noreply@blogger.comBlogger67125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-42824975985463883062016-05-08T23:58:15.399-07:002016-05-08T23:58:15.399-07:00Agreed. Nicole, my heart goes out to you for this....Agreed. Nicole, my heart goes out to you for this. But you have not "failed"! I will give you a big hug and we can "fail" together -- and Nicole, you are going to love it. You can stand in as a mother in heart to others' children. And meantime enjoy your own life more than you thought possible.Christinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14782517191208975197noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-25390352149819856092015-03-13T10:46:56.221-07:002015-03-13T10:46:56.221-07:00Annie C,
I sympathize with your regrets. All I wou...Annie C,<br />I sympathize with your regrets. All I would ask from you is to consider how bad human beings can be at predicting how they would feel in a different situation. (People are surprisingly really poor at predicting how they will feel in the future. Think about how many people who win the lottery say "I thought I would be happier, but now sometimes I wish I hadn't won.") <Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00538008432855153702noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-2267361873609439212015-02-11T23:57:36.760-08:002015-02-11T23:57:36.760-08:00I'm currently in deep grief about not having a...I'm currently in deep grief about not having a child, and regret the opportunities i missed. I was wanting the perfect situation, thinking that was being responsible and loving, But i now think it was spoiled and ungrateful. These heartbreaking stories and posts of those regretting having children, are helpful in giving another perspective. However, in my experience, having children has Annie Chttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04532121315823334198noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-82525406229073442562015-02-11T23:53:41.494-08:002015-02-11T23:53:41.494-08:00i am childless and grieving intensely the opportun...i am childless and grieving intensely the opportunites i missed. i appreciate these posts sharing a positive perspective of not having children. However, in my experience many of my friends have children and although it's not easy, it's a beautiful thing and they are very happy. They have a family of their own. And it connects them with their extended families and other friends with Annie Chttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04532121315823334198noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-91719004737571786452014-12-18T20:55:57.950-08:002014-12-18T20:55:57.950-08:00Very nice and helpful information has been given i...<br />Very nice and helpful information has been given in this article. I like the way you explain the things. Keep posting. Thanks..<br /><a href="http://www.onlychildproject.com/" rel="nofollow">Only Child</a>Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08945016623289444607noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-50537106050398637752014-07-29T06:27:40.360-07:002014-07-29T06:27:40.360-07:00I am a mother of a three year old son. Adjusting t...I am a mother of a three year old son. Adjusting to motherhood was the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. At first I was filled with a sense of panic at the weight of the responsibility now resting on my shoulders. I had no idea it was going to be this hard, this restricting, this suffocating. I probably would have been diagnosed with PND except that I was positive that it was not just Emhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15437848864588163662noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-24013790020687790142014-05-30T23:43:23.305-07:002014-05-30T23:43:23.305-07:00so happy to have found your blog! im 35 and been m...so happy to have found your blog! im 35 and been married for 14 years. i knew i didnt want kids the day i got married. both my mom and grandma had kids at 17, shotgun, and relatives were speculating that i must have followed their footsteps when i got married at 21 but im so glad to have proven them wrong. now my mom and grandma look up to me because i knew what i wanted and now they wished they kaylenehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03074909887135540918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-87975171686823343352014-04-21T14:06:16.683-07:002014-04-21T14:06:16.683-07:00I wish I didn't have a child. Yes i love my da...I wish I didn't have a child. Yes i love my daughter, but I am miserable.I refuse to go on any medication. My plan is just to leave her with her father and get my life back, then come back when I am happy again. This life is crap. I will make sure I tell everyone I meet to NOT HAVE ANY KIDS.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04564136032560628545noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-78165085616279715972013-08-29T06:16:49.137-07:002013-08-29T06:16:49.137-07:00I would like to reply to Nicola's post :
&quo...I would like to reply to Nicola's post : <br />"After 5 unsuccessful cycles of IVF I've just found out that I'm unlikely to ever have kids and have fallen into a real depression. I've failed at the most fundemental aspect of womanhood: being a mother. Thank you all for this blog."<br /><br />Having kids is NOT the most fundamental aspect of womanhood- We are NOT breedingcosmeticshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01449498220620220986noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-16400015029445311432013-08-18T12:47:36.887-07:002013-08-18T12:47:36.887-07:00and sometimes it's not over after they turn 18...and sometimes it's not over after they turn 18. some parents have to deal with college expenses, and when they graduate from college they may need to come back home until they get on there feet. so you never know, for many parents it's never over not even when the child turns 45. trust me I know parents right now that are taking care of there grown adult children ( which who are not sick Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06289608767028552216noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-5647754957021060092013-06-26T03:46:37.089-07:002013-06-26T03:46:37.089-07:00Lot's of these mothers have young children. Th...Lot's of these mothers have young children. They think it's hard now, oh wait, just wait until their kids are teenagers. No one prepares you for that either. If you think that your teenagers will just go to do their room and you won't have to deal with them as much anymore, I couldn't even being to tell you how wrong you are. Just like you were naive about children before havingAnonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16552681362177440757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-43811409288910318612013-06-06T13:28:06.255-07:002013-06-06T13:28:06.255-07:00I was fortunate at an early age to able to 'st...I was fortunate at an early age to able to 'step back' and observe people with children. Those I knew, those I saw in malls, grocery stores, theatres, etc. and each time it was constant strife, constant bickering, nagging, near disasters as the little buggers would try and run, etc etc etc. <br />I was fortunate in I have (and had) little desire to breed. It also was not drummed into my twocentshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10246927023753774512noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-37301887344892430432013-05-29T11:33:27.554-07:002013-05-29T11:33:27.554-07:00I truly applaud the mothers out there who honestly...I truly applaud the mothers out there who honestly express their regret about having children. I am one of those mothers. I love both my children dearly, but they were difficult to raise. I spend my entire paycheck for tutors, clothing, children outings, etc. I had to hold down dead end, low paying jobs that I normally would not do if I were child-free. <br /><br />I married very young and was Cindyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05581436751156811399noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-59417143039583004742013-05-14T17:36:45.274-07:002013-05-14T17:36:45.274-07:00Please take your sweeping generalizations elsewher...Please take your sweeping generalizations elsewhere.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10999870464478427236noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-87494479300935143292013-05-06T20:43:11.991-07:002013-05-06T20:43:11.991-07:00This makes me feel as if I made the right decision...This makes me feel as if I made the right decision. I remember being told that I had PCOS when I was about seventeen. The strange thing was, I was so relieved that I probably wouldn't have children. The strange thing is that I like kids and even teenagers in general, I just don't want to live with them.<br /><br />My husband knew the likelyhood of having children was pretty low, so we Heather Dhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12199788339208313879noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-28751562180011377162013-02-09T22:19:10.280-08:002013-02-09T22:19:10.280-08:00to be quite honest, i have yet to meet any childfr...to be quite honest, i have yet to meet any childfree person who doesn't seem happy and fulfilled. my cousin, for one, is travelling all over europe without having to drag a snotty kid or having to worry about schedules. because we hail from a third world country, we, her cousins, can not help but wonder at her freedom, travel experiences and her successes in life. recently she quit her job ariahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14390227988630598688noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-57416318770462641382013-01-24T08:22:07.346-08:002013-01-24T08:22:07.346-08:00Sara, I agree with you that attitude is everything...Sara, I agree with you that attitude is everything. I am an optimistic, positive person by nature, and I have never viewed myself as a victim, even when my circumstances were not good. I have often thought that I would be upbeat and positive even if I had kids, because it's just the way I am. I would make the best of life and focus on the positive and not the negative.<br /><br />Having Childfreeeeehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01776614837813912148noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-27056494662032972482013-01-23T10:51:23.281-08:002013-01-23T10:51:23.281-08:00What all these mothers have in common is that they...What all these mothers have in common is that they are blaming external circumstances over which they feel they have absolutely no power(in this case: their kids' existence and the high expectations they have of themselves as mothers) for their misery and suffering. The child-free commenters claim their conscious choice has provided them with an easy path to happiness and bliss (or just Sara en Mariehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15933081635835722346noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-29557082958045080172012-12-20T14:34:02.898-08:002012-12-20T14:34:02.898-08:00Dear Donna.
I am so sorry to hear of your troub...Dear Donna. <br /><br />I am so sorry to hear of your troubles. I am 38 happily married for 5 years (we have been together for 16 years). We always felt that we weren't up for the job of parenting and have been happy without children so far. However, over the past month, I have been in turmoil over whether or not I should take the plunge just in case I regret not having children when I amTinahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03739560692169456298noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-23810663049917195522012-12-16T16:34:29.482-08:002012-12-16T16:34:29.482-08:00This comment has been removed by the author.January B. Wrotehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10548187064319686137noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-21830110444713573402012-11-12T12:59:03.605-08:002012-11-12T12:59:03.605-08:00My husband and I decided to have a child in our mi...My husband and I decided to have a child in our mid-40s. I was the one who really pushed for it, fearing I would regret not having children and thinking, "well, this is my last chance ...." We did IVF and, no joke, up until the day before beginning the cycle I was unsure about the decision and thought we might be better off enjoying our later years together, without the burden of Donna B. Vincihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17412504779946604205noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-52703704206008922272012-11-01T08:35:14.415-07:002012-11-01T08:35:14.415-07:00After 5 unsuccessful cycles of IVF I've just f...After 5 unsuccessful cycles of IVF I've just found out that I'm unlikely to ever have kids and have fallen into a real depression. I've failed at the most fundemental aspect of womanhood: being a mother. Thank you all for this blog. You've made me feel so much better, and I've smiled for the first time in days. In fact, I even laughed! I'm going on holiday abroad in a few Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09931146402182740594noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-2993079273654169142012-10-18T08:16:51.390-07:002012-10-18T08:16:51.390-07:00I love my life now and I love kids... But I also l...I love my life now and I love kids... But I also love my freedom... My husband doesn't want to have kids but for the past year I have been having baby fever...I know I would be an excellent mother but I am just afraid that I would do the right things as a parent and brought up my child as a useful component of society. I am so afraid of not doing the right :( thank you ladies for your insightMelanitahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15631874673844188601noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-17512164973935408542012-09-13T04:48:46.519-07:002012-09-13T04:48:46.519-07:00I'm sorry to say this but I dont feel pity for...I'm sorry to say this but I dont feel pity for those women who had more than 1 child. Because before you have had 1, you can have all kinds of ideas and dreams about parenthood which then fail to come true. BUT if you really hated parenting that much but still went ahead and had a 2nd, 3rd or 4th, it's totally their own fault and instead I feel bad for the kids for having a mother who Oceaniahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03327584697074953888noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-7360396276284353282012-09-06T09:55:18.690-07:002012-09-06T09:55:18.690-07:00Thanks to everyone here who openly shared their op...Thanks to everyone here who openly shared their opinion! I've been thinking about the way I feel about parenthood a lot lately. When I look into myself, I don't see a spec of desire to have children. The reasons are countless and I won't bore anybody with them. The main thing for me is that I don't think I'd be a loving parent. I'm sure I can be a good parent but not a Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15739542873559903288noreply@blogger.com