tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post6122524419336273552..comments2023-10-29T08:17:42.840-07:00Comments on Childfreedom: Meeting CF FolksChildfreeeeehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01776614837813912148noreply@blogger.comBlogger23125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-19712474017451893342009-12-07T12:14:50.240-08:002009-12-07T12:14:50.240-08:00Met my husband @ a bar. He was undecided about hav...Met my husband @ a bar. He was undecided about having kids. I introduced him to reason and logic on the subject and now he's as firmly CF as I am.<br /><br />We have some CF friends but I wish we had more. We met a few online. We like the idea of a CF group but worry about the issues nyxmoxie discussed. We wouldn't want to hang around mean 1 dimensional people. We don't like kids, we Insomniac Chefhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16768930838751628376noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-27609795041323424012009-11-15T18:32:19.313-08:002009-11-15T18:32:19.313-08:00I have lots of childfree friends. One reason is th...I have lots of childfree friends. One reason is that I work in the legal field, and many people who become lawyers tend to be career focused not child centered. Also, if I had a meet up and only two or three people showed up, I would still make the most of it. Those two or three people could turn out to be life long friends if we went to coffee, a movie and played some cards. What a fun idea to sara starhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04826686885318466824noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-49167752508337794722009-11-14T16:47:11.112-08:002009-11-14T16:47:11.112-08:00I'm CF and I've spent quite a bit of time ...I'm CF and I've spent quite a bit of time on the internet on CF forums all over the web. <br /><br />The problem is that at certain CF forums they spend so much time complaining about kids and how horrible kids are, that I'm not interested in meeting up those types of people.<br /><br />Sometimes CF forums can be quite humorous. They sound like parents complaining about kids but Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-45754205183759852382009-11-11T10:18:16.598-08:002009-11-11T10:18:16.598-08:00Oprah knows who butters her bread, and it's MO...<b>Oprah knows who butters her bread, and it's MOMS. And she knows MOMS would not be able to wrap their heads around her stating she simply does not WANT kids.</b><br /><br />I think this the one thing that always pissed me off about her show. She panders like crazy to moms. Before I had HawkBaby, I would always roll my eyes when she would gush about "The hardest job EVARRRR!" Now Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-68313653399778486802009-11-11T09:52:46.962-08:002009-11-11T09:52:46.962-08:00Hi HawkMom
Thanks for your comment. I actually w...Hi HawkMom<br /><br />Thanks for your comment. I actually wrote to Oprah before asking her to do a show on the childfree lifestyle (and encouraged my readers to do the same). You can read about this here: <br />http://childfreedom.blogspot.com/2009/07/oprah-close-but-no-cigar.html<br />(Read the comments to this blog post for the actual letter I sent). I never received as much as a response Childfreeeeehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01776614837813912148noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-3893415911557875652009-11-11T09:19:46.709-08:002009-11-11T09:19:46.709-08:00I understand what a previous commenter was saying ...I understand what a previous commenter was saying about CF meetups. I would sign up for mommy groups and never show up. When it came down to it, I wanted to have conversation that didn't revolve around diapers and toys. I realized I was using my baby as a social crutch. The same way people use dogs as conversation-openers. Pathetic. <br /><br />I don't do that anymore, but I am waiting toAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-6603608223339053682009-11-10T08:16:15.574-08:002009-11-10T08:16:15.574-08:00Hi! Just found this blog(thank gawd!) Will be foll...Hi! Just found this blog(thank gawd!) Will be following. Going to read some more posts now!Cathyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06961186041071578537noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-79717138317607072102009-11-09T09:08:37.990-08:002009-11-09T09:08:37.990-08:00Meeting Childfreeeee and her hubby was a wonderful...Meeting Childfreeeee and her hubby was a wonderful experience for both me and my DH. We had such a great time with them!<br /><br />Unfortunately, there are very, very few CF couples in our current social circle. I wish there were more! The few that we do know aren't people we share much in common with either. You can certainly be CF and have totally different personalities and interests.CFVixenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00777723818313211020noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-80649481840247377912009-11-09T02:37:37.835-08:002009-11-09T02:37:37.835-08:00Hi Almost Alright,
I don't know if the first ...Hi Almost Alright,<br /><br />I don't know if the first date would be appropriate (I am thinking probably not in most cases), however I wouldn't wait very long. Maybe if things are going well and this seems like a person you are really hitting it off with, it might be good to bring it up by the third date. Sure, it may feel awkward and you can say that up front - something like, "Childfreeeeehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01776614837813912148noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-27455545293497625312009-11-08T18:22:02.592-08:002009-11-08T18:22:02.592-08:00I have a question for people.
Isn't it terrib...I have a question for people.<br /><br />Isn't it terribly awkward to bring up childfreedom on a first date or even very early in a relationship?<br /><br />Maybe it's just b/c I'm at an age where I'm still dating to hang out with someone rather than looking for a "life partner," but I think it would feel a lot like discussing what you want your wedding dress to look Almost Alrighthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08550702198860435010noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-83990550307659837032009-11-07T15:17:02.450-08:002009-11-07T15:17:02.450-08:00I know lots of CF people...I'm an artist. In m...I know lots of CF people...I'm an artist. In my experience, people who think outside the box self-select quite often into the CF range because they don't blindly follow scripts and they question everything.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-27773993239034179042009-11-06T18:21:05.350-08:002009-11-06T18:21:05.350-08:00Serafina - wow what a wonderful story about how yo...Serafina - wow what a wonderful story about how you met your husband! I know many people don't have that kind of luck on the dating sites, but I also know many who do. I know some couples who met on Match.com and ended up getting married.<br /><br />I know Match.com also has an option for stating whether you have or want kids.Childfreeeeehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01776614837813912148noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-73366026856636606402009-11-06T18:17:30.130-08:002009-11-06T18:17:30.130-08:00As always, lots of great comments!
I just realize...As always, lots of great comments!<br /><br />I just realized that I have a "childfree friend" story that I can share with you.<br /><br />One of the regular commenters on this blog, CFVixen, is a friend of mine. We "met" a few years ago on a discussion board - not a CF board, but a board that is mostly women talking about all kinds of topics. If I remember correctly, one Childfreeeeehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01776614837813912148noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-19691747736146478682009-11-06T17:48:40.764-08:002009-11-06T17:48:40.764-08:00My husband and I met via eHarmony. For all the rec...My husband and I met via eHarmony. For all the recent criticism, eHarmony was a wonderful experience for me. It gave me many options on a number of important issues such as religion, geographic location, alcohol consumption, and yes, even kids. For me, I did not want someone who wanted kids, had small children or even grown children for that matter. And eHarmony allowed me to have those options Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-54026751493804802272009-11-06T14:57:01.611-08:002009-11-06T14:57:01.611-08:00My husband and I just recently signed up for one o...My husband and I just recently signed up for one of the "No Kidding!" chapters in our city. We've only lived here a year or so, and we really don't have any acquaintances outside of work yet.<br /><br />The group is free, which is nice, and it seems like the group is fairly active. Everyone that signs up has to make an introductory post in the forum (to show they're reallyL4UR4https://www.blogger.com/profile/11309604251449305354noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-72750149305203798472009-11-06T13:11:05.048-08:002009-11-06T13:11:05.048-08:00The whole "tons of people sign up but few act...The whole "tons of people sign up but few actually ever show up" syndrome isn't just with CF meet-up groups. I'm part of several different groups on MeetUp.com and it happens a lot. I don't know why that happens, but maybe people just join those groups more to see that they're not alone, rather than actually meeting people?<br /><br />I agree with djmist and Erin. HavingThe Pinthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06987851778195111585noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-5945090313406299502009-11-06T11:07:19.626-08:002009-11-06T11:07:19.626-08:00I, too, find CF couples / singles to be more inter...I, too, find CF couples / singles to be more interesting and stimulating (presumably, because they do keep up with current events, read interesting books, enjoy road trips, etc. and generally can have adult conversations); however, I don’t want to limit my circle of friends solely to those who are CF. It would possibly exclude people whose company I enjoy because we share common hobbies or Erinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18205302651920801280noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-35926332187240495682009-11-06T07:54:59.622-08:002009-11-06T07:54:59.622-08:00I know how you feel. My new husband and I are in ...I know how you feel. My new husband and I are in our early thirties and have a lot of friends but they all either have kids or will be having kids soon. It makes me wonder who we will hang out with once all our friends have children. Not that they can never hang out but they can't be spontaneous, stay out late or do many activities without their children. I think kids are fine but I don&#Sarahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16481900398488540099noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-34078841505602445172009-11-06T06:21:28.707-08:002009-11-06T06:21:28.707-08:00Frazzled student, I share your opinion that it'...Frazzled student, I share your opinion that it's best to bring up the kids issue very early on in a dating relationship. It needs to be gotten out of the way early, before any serious emotional attachments begin. I truly believe that a relationship in which 2 people do not agree on children is doomed.<br /><br />Erin, we also met some nice people in my CF group but I wouldn't say we Childfreeeeehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01776614837813912148noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-75596768006675493672009-11-06T04:18:38.218-08:002009-11-06T04:18:38.218-08:00Too funny! I ran a CF meetup group for a year, sam...Too funny! I ran a CF meetup group for a year, same problem. A member took it over and ran it for a few months then folded it, again with the same problem. <br />This is extremely discouraging.<br />My wife and I are also looking for ways to find CF couples to hang with, without much luck.<br /><br />I think you just have to try and expand your circle, and hope that you meet at least a few CF Chrishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09582578799885677666noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-77235005674359379762009-11-05T14:21:06.015-08:002009-11-05T14:21:06.015-08:00While sites like this one are great for talking to...While sites like this one are great for talking to like-minded people, I would never focus on specific characteristics to define a person/group that I wanted to socialize with. Perhaps this explains why many people don't turn out to events, yet are more than happy to discuss ideologies online. The thing is, I think it's likely that I would like/dislike the same percentage of childfree djmisthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16004501762436897210noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-25266803948694712562009-11-05T13:30:29.059-08:002009-11-05T13:30:29.059-08:00I run a childfree meetup site, too, and I have the...I run a childfree meetup site, too, and I have the exact same issue you run into. Lots of people signing up, no one participating. I have met a few people through the group that I hang out with outside the group, but no one I've really, seriously clicked with.Erinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11394617623909746445noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6155688048560818982.post-47917207671693512052009-11-05T12:46:49.925-08:002009-11-05T12:46:49.925-08:00I love your blog!
My husband and I do have a coup...I love your blog!<br /><br />My husband and I do have a couple--our best friends--that are child free. But, that's because they're gay and haven't yet reached a definitive decision on whether or not they want children someday.<br /><br />I'm at a loss for how to make childfree friends as well, so will be keeping an eye on the comments here for ideas.<br /><br />As far as meeting Ellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06029614712855760844noreply@blogger.com